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How to Deal with Disappointment

How to Deal with Disappointment

 

Quotables: “Everything that has made humanity great came from setting high standards and having high visions for ourselves. There is nothing wrong with expecting a lot of ourselves. Having a learning mindset prevents you from being disappointed.” – @BrendonBurchard

This is Brendon filmed in a single take and unscripted, just ranting about life and high performance without notes or a prompter.

Brendon Burchard is a #1 New York Times bestselling author whose books include THE CHARGE, THE MILLIONAIRE MESSENGER, and LIFE’S GOLDEN TICKET. Larry King named him “one of the top motivation and marketing trainers in the world.” 

The Gift of Adversity: Norman Rosenthal

The Gift of Adversity: Norman Rosenthal

 

adversity norman rosenthal

 

Norman Rosenthal is the world-renowned psychiatrist, researcher and best-selling author, who first described seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and pioneered the use of light therapy as a treatment during his 20 years at the National Institute of Mental Health.

A highly cited researcher, he has written over 200 scholarly articles, and authored or co-authored eight popular books. These include Winter Blues, the New York Times bestseller Transcendence, and The Gift of Adversity. Listed as one of the Best Doctors in America, he has practiced psychiatry for over three decades, and has coached people from all walks of life — such as corporate leaders, athletes and actors.

Rosenthal has conducted numerous clinical trials of medications and alternative treatments, such as Transcendental Meditation, for psychiatric disorders. He and his work have been featured on Good Morning America, The Today Show, NPR and other national media. 

Possibilities—Life’s Invisible Feast: Sarah Susanka

Possibilities—Life’s Invisible Feast: Sarah Susanka

 

sarah susanka

 

Sarah Susanka’s “Not So Big” message has become a launch pad for a new dimension of understanding how we inhabit our homes, our planet and our lives. A thought leader and acclaimed architect, Susanka is the best-selling author of nine books that collectively weave together home and life design, revealing that a “Not So Big” attitude serves not only architectural aims, but life goals as well. Her books have sold well over one million copies.

Architect Sarah Susanka asks us to re:THINK life’s possibilities — and in doing so, opens us up to a potential feast In every moment. 

 

We are often encouraged to follow our passion…our heart. But sometimes either that passion isn’t clear, or the path toward it is obscured. Susanka reassures us that by simply being present to your bliss — in every possible moment — you’re more likely to encounter that singular passion in your life. Just be present and completely engaged in whatever you’re doing, and the banquet will unfold. A key is to look beyond the “filters” that we’ve all become accustomed to and accepting of. 

 

Here she teaches us that beyond those filters lie powerful life lessons in simple moments — if we are present to them. And if we are, “Life becomes a playground for your own growth.” 

 

 

Needs: What’s Real & What’s Aspirational by Dr. Bill DeMarco

Dr. Bill DeMarco

Values, History and Folklore, are the core elements of culture at a point in time.  They are our link to our personal past…handed down to us by all those who came before us. This is true of our ethnic culture, our tribal culture, our national culture, our religious culture, and our personal culture, to name just a few.   Since we are the link to our past, we are caretakers of something precious as we hand it down to future generations.  Since culture is a living thing, it does change over time, but ever so slowly.  Just think about it; there is some behavioral mannerism, belief, perception that you got from an ancestor who lived a hundred or many hundreds of years ago.  To use a modern expression, “You are Connected”.  There really is nothing new under the sun, other than our choice of what we will do with our cultural inheritance.  Since culture is a living phenomenon, we will make our choices and then pass the culture on to future generations, along with our contributions.  That is the way it is and that is the way it will continue to be.

Image 1: DeMarco Culture Model

© 2003 Dr. Bill DeMarco

All of this gets us back to our discussion of Values.   I described Values as “the unique blend of perceived NeedsBeliefs, and Attitudes that live in the behaviour of most members of a society”.   Needs are one of three segments of the Values element of my Culture Model (Image 1).  Needs, along with Beliefs and Attitudes, taken separately and in their interaction, make up our unique Values proposition.

Within a cultural context, Needs are similar to what Abraham Maslow (Image 2) describes as the fundamental requirements for survival, safety and belonging. They have everything to do with the necessities of the human condition, and nothing to do with a luxury car in the garage, a kitchen with granite counter tops, and two weeks in Saint Kitts! The latter, at the extreme end, has more to do with our image of “Esteem”.

 

 

Image 2: Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

 

 

Maslow’s work linked Needs to motivation.  While his groundbreaking work is still challenged by some, I find his conclusions compelling.  Satisfying individual and group needs at the three basic levels in the above image greatly facilitates our ability to incorporate our Beliefs into our Values system. Remember I wrote earlier that if we want to know what our real values are, look at our behaviour and not our words.  There is a strong link between our ability to survive and our ability to put our Beliefs into action.

 

Here is a simple exercise that can help identify our real personal needs. It involves reading and reflecting on the bottom three categories of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs (Image 2).  Then make a list of what those Needs look like in your life.  Put that under a category labeled “Needs”.  Everything else that comes to mind, put under a category labeled “Wants”.  There is nothing wrong with “Wants”…Just don’t confuse the two!

 

Meaningful reflections!

 

Dr. Bill DeMarco

 

‘The Ripple Effect’ presented by Dr. Kevin Snyder

‘The Ripple Effect’ presented by Dr. Kevin Snyder

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Negative emotions creation cycle

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